idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
