she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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