My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
