I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize