Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
