dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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