I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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