THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
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I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I can't put those talents on a resume
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize