so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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