Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
