ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
