She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
