If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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