And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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