so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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