i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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