i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
