you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
This is my gift to your gina
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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