I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
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He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
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I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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