I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
