What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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