Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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