I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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