I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
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hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
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I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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