I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
