can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
