I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize