i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...