Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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