Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
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He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
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I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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