Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
