Where is the hickey?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize