all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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