Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Omg I joined a choir last night...
that is very illegal...i love you.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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