Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
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