hotel room ftw
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
