Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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