Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
