I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
