It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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