Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
