we're blogging at a bar
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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