why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
