to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
