Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
