on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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