That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
