you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
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I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
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My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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