They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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