I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Randomize
