sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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